I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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