We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Randomize
