too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
