Having a random hookup so left but love u
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize