we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
