I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Randomize
