i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
