I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
