You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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