I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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