It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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