I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I can't put those talents on a resume
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
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