So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
You did what with his pubic hair?
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
