Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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