dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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