thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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