my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Randomize
