champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
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