I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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