I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
3 2 1 whiskey
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Randomize
