and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Let the clothes fall where they may.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
