Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
