Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Randomize
