He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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