i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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