I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize