NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
