The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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