my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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