it hurts more in the daytime
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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