I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
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