White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize