Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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