The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Randomize
