I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
