I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
