Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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