let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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