Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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