It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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