he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
