Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize