I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Randomize
