BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
