Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Randomize
