We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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