Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
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