I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I would ride that face into the sunset
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
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