This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
We had sex on a dog bed..
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
