HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Randomize
